Ohmystinkinheck

We’re running a smidgeon behind on our back-to-school haircuts and I was raring to get back into Ms. Bonnie’s chair with the hopes she’d err and accidentally cut my hair too short. And? She didn’t. I was the unthrilled recipient of a careful trim that guaranteed another 6 weeks of healthy hair growth.

Oh.Joy.

I’ve written about our hair stylist and her digs before. As much as I know I can drive an hour and 1/2 south to Houston and prop myself up into the chair of a high-falootin (is that even how you spell that?), high dollar, stylist, I don’t care. The last time I went to one of those places a man with very little handle on the English language plucked my eyebrows with a thread. Seriously, a thread rolled between his fingers. I think that’s why it cost an extra $10.00. It’s how the “french” do it apparently.

Give me a break and hand over the hot, sticky, mucky, singe-your-face, out-of-the-crock-pot, dingy, yellow, wax. Add some good gossip conversation about the local flea market/burger joint gettin’ “run over” by the new Valero being built down the highway … and I’m a’comin’ to your chair.

Now THAT is something I’ll pay $15.00 to hear. Yep, $15.00. You can roll your eyes, but Bonnie doesn’t give just any ol’ Supercut. No-sirrrreeeee, she cuts me up real good.

After I had my head done up, it was Em’s turn. She, like me, loves having her hair washed. Ohhhhhh … what feels better than a woman with long nails just a rubbin’ all over your head?

Nothing, that’s what.

I remember when I used to do this in the hairstylist’s chair.

I couldn’t criss cross apple sauce in that chair now to save my life. Okay, maybe to save my life, but then they’d have to cut the chair off me - and folks, that’d just be rude of me to destroy Ms. Bonnie’s property after she gives us such great treatment.

While Emelie was busy having her bangs cut out of her face (Lord help us all with the preteen bangs.), Meredith was checking out the latest picture of Ms. Bonnie’s daughter, the Crocodile Wrestler. Yep, you read that right. Meredith is holding in her hand a certificate of completion for a crocodile wrestling course. Attached at the bottom of the certificate is a photo of one dirty, wet, 135 lb. girl on a dirty, angry crocodile. Okay, I don’t really know if the croc was angry - how does one KNOW? He LOOKS angry though - and well, it makes for a better story, now doesn’t it?

There are few things in life I absolutely have NO DESIRE to do - and croc wrestling … it’s one of ‘em.

Kenny normally spends most of our visits out on the rock pile with Ms. Bonnie’s dump trucks. You know, most hair places have those little Lego tables or books, but at Ms. Bonnie’s you can play outside with dump trucks on the rocks or inside with old perm curlers. My kids LOVE to go there. LOVE.IT.

See how joyful they are?

I named this one the Baptist Entertainment Committee. I have no idea why.

On his way out the door Kenny got caught up playing with Ms. Bonnie’s windchimes.

Ms. Bonnie has a lot of porch and yard art, as well as a serious green thumb. I’ve purchased plants I’ve seen at her place, brought them home and watched them die. Jeff is good at keeping things alive.

He says it is because he goes outside.

OH! Is that what it takes?

26 Responses to “Ms. Bonnie’s”

1. Kristen

   I love every single picture. They are great!

2. chocolatechic

   Oh, how I wish I had a Ms. Bonnie’s. That would be pure bliss. As it is, I am stuck with Smart Style out of Stuffmart.

3. Laura

   how CUTE!!! :) i liked this post. ahhhh, the joys of hometown living. (i’m visiting my dad in NC this week, and so am of course feeling ever-so-nostalgic :P)

   also, DUDE, where can iiiii sign up for a croc wrestling course?!?! eek! :)

4. MR. OMSH

   A comment on the very last paragraph. Let me clarify and teach: IT. IS. WHAT. YOU. DO. OUTSIDE. that keeps the plants alive.

   Aren’t those children of hers just gorgeous? Yes, I concur.

5. kerflop

   First of all, my eyebrows would laugh until they were sick if someone came at them with a piece of thread. Hot wax and lots of it. Plus tweezers stronger than vice grips.

   And croc wrestling? I give up, you win.

6. mamalang

   Gorgeous photos. I miss that little small town middle of nowhere beauty shop experience. I do have to say, though, the wash girl at my salon is the best…and I, too, love me some hair washing.

7. bethany actually

   I’ve heard threading is pretty cool. You didn’t like? I am curious why.

8. Tara

   I grew up in Houston and went to college an hour and a half north (I’m an Aggie). What part of Texas are you in?

9. Holley

   Ahem, no picture of your head. I absolutely love to get my hair washed at the salon. I would pay just to have them wash my hair till I fell asleep.

   Ahhhhh!!!

10. TheAngelForever

    I am SO glad I am not the only one that did not like threading. I hated it when I tried it.I had tears streaming out of my eyes as my husband watched. I was jumpy every time the girl came at me. It is definitely not for people with sensitive skin. Ugh - my brows throbbed for days. I am a waxing girl when I feel the need to torture much easier (which has been a long time).

    Love your photos as always!

11. Kami

    Ms. Bonnie’s sounds devine. Great pictures:-)

12. KYouell

    I’m pretty sure (since I keep listening to your song stylings) that I accurately heard you tell me this post, and that made it all the better. I wanna go to a place like that! Not that I dislike where I get my haircut, but I’m thinking that there is no place there to wrangle the 2yo. I’m going to have to just take the baby with me next time. And that makes me sad because I haven’t had a haircut without him there since he was born. Actually, I schedule my trimming appointments for the down time in my friend’s color/cut appointments so the 4 of us (stylist included) have made a mini version of your cool set-up for 2 years now. I’ve got to figure a way to bring the boy with us. And I’ve got to get a hair cut! The last time was 2 days before the baby was born and that was over 4 months ago.

    No wonder I’m seriously envious of short hair right now.

13. OMSH

    Kristen - Why thank ya!

    chocolatechic - Stuffmart? *snicker*

    Laura - This place? It has always been home in my heart. I grew up in Houston and my grandparents had a ranch out here. I live my nostalgia. :)

    Croc wrestling happened in Colorado, apparently. Although we’re told crocs are showing up at Lake Conroe.

    Mr.OMSH - What I “do” outside? I’m sorry. Could you please explain further? Talk to me like a 3 year old.

    kerflop - You and your eyebrow frenzies. I’m kinda glad you have eyebrows to wrestle with (in lieu of crocs), b/c after getting the looks, height, great hair, and add on a great personality, it wouldn’t be fair if your eyebrows were compliant as well.

    mamalang - Some people want massage chairs. I want a hat I can slide on my head with massage fingers and warm water.

    Surely someone can invent THAT!

    bethany actually - THREADING?! It has a “name”? That torturous experience now is NAMED? Ask TheAngelForever … you have to practice lamaze to get through it.

    AND I HAVE DELIVERED TWO BABIES NATURALLY.

    Tara - fellow Aggie here - WHOOP! In fact, we are all Aggies and faithfully indoctrinating our children. Ms. Bonnie’s in Dodge and we, my dear, are in Huntsville.

    Holley - Yea, well … there will be a Hair Chronicle picture to come, but you SEE … there is no one around to take my photos. I AM THE PHOTO QUEEN. Mr. OMSH takes what I can only describe as aerial photos. I’m like, “Oh, I think I see me … riiiiiiight there?”

    Kami - She is absolutely slicker ‘n a goose poop, I tell ya.

    KYouell - DANG GIRL! If I was there I’d drive to your house and let YOU go and get your hair washed, head rubbed, cut and styled hooligan-less.

14. Meg

    Nice Camo shirt on the boy. My 9-YO son came home with one just like it; he wears it with camo shorts that absolutely DO NOT MATCH! Same color but conflicting camo patterns.

    Also - I think it’s high-falutin’. But I could be wrong.

    You made me remember that it’s been way too long since I had my eyebrows done OR had a good haircut! And while I’m at it I could use a good pedicure… you know, because I have free time like that.

15. OMSH

    Meg - I have a photo I took of another day when we were moving my parents. Same shirt with a pair of camo (different pattern, like your son) carpenter shorts.

    High-falutin’ looks right … I’ll buy it.

    Go get your feet scrubbed. Nothing like a good de-scaling to make a gal feel like a lady.

16. TheAngelForever

    LOL - Lamaze would have made no difference for me and threading. I had to remind myself to breathe regular. My husband couldn’t believe how I was clutching the chair since I have a good pain threshold. That was just cruel and unusual punishment - and I paid for it too! Seriously they need to make an eyebrow epidural of sorts for people who have that done.

    The girl was smart to keep her body off to the side since I darn well nearly kicked a few times. Not a baby here, but it really hurt me and tingled for days after, unlike waxing which feels better in 24 hours.

17. KYouell

    Oh, no, I like having him with me. This friend who gets her hair done at the same time gets to get her baby fix (single and in her late 20’s, she needs to visit with mine). It’s worked out well. Except for the hairdryer because my Biscuit doesn’t think it’s cool that some lady is aiming that thing at his mom’s head. :-)

    Really, I’m just worried that wrangling 2 of ‘em is too much for my friend while her color is soaking in. I think I’ll just stick a playyard where the nail lady used to have her spot.

    I do appreciate the offer though. I love having my hair washed. Perhaps I can find a volunteer around the house to do that for me… hmmm!

18. OMSH

    TheAngelForever - Had she caused you to use your *ahem* reflexes, perhaps you might have managed a discount? Bwahahahaha!

    KYouell - I took Kenny everywhere. He was always content to just BE with me. The girls? INTO EVERYTHING! However, more often than not it was me, 3 kids, and no extra hands. :)

19. Stephen

    I love porches. Looks like a great place.
    WHOOP! Aggies Rock (99)

20. OMSH

    Stephen - You’re making me feel old now! Class of ‘94! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!

21. MammaLoves

    Those photos are gorgeous. How do you get that great light? What kind of camera are you using? I’m envious.

    Oh and threading? My BFF calls it Chinese Eyebrow Torture. Only because it was done to her by a chinese woman.

    I’m with you. Give me the wax!!

22. Jill - GlossyVeneer

    They had an article in the style section of the newspaper about threading. Apparently the author loved it, but it only cost her $8. At some dingy out of the way shop in a scary neighborhood. Yech…

    I love getting my hair washed. I want to go get my hair cut just for that reason now. Sounds heavenly…

23. jen

    Oh, I couldn’t get ‘em waxed. Oh no, I could not! I like the tweezers. Causing myself pain is just part of my beauty regimen. If it doesn’t hurt? And, I don’t cause that pain? It, then, isn’t perty.
    Though, I noticed the Little who was reading Junie B. Jones. I love those books!

24. Aileen

    You know…this is the second time I’ve read about an eyebrow waxing that’s done with threads. I have a friend in NYC who goes to this indian salon and that’s how they do it there. She says that the sensation is different from the scalding hot wax ripping hair out process, but she says the end result looks a lot better. More neater. Does it? I have eyebrows like Groucho Marx and really need to remain disciplined about getting them ripped at least once a month!!

25. Mrs. Wilson

    hahaha, those last two lines made me laugh

    I’m another one that LOVES having her hair washed. LOVE IT.

26. OMSH

    MammaLoves - The light was what was in Bonnie’s shop. It is long and narrow and full of windows. :) I use a Nikon D70. I’ve had it since November 2004 and I LOVE IT.

    Jill - GlossyVeneer - I didn’t realize this was such the rage. Then again, if you have to go to a dingy, out-of-the-way place, maybe not?

    jen - Yeppers…avid Junie B. Jones fans. Oh, and Judy Moody too. :)

    I can’t do tweezers except for a few here and there. I end up doing a great job for one side of my face and poop out on the other half! HA!

    Aileen - It is only neat if you sit STILL. heh heh Sorta like a tattoo. I don’t have Groucho Marx brows … mine are wild and free and like to turn up an inch from my brow line as if a random unplucked hair on my face is NORMAL.

    Mrs. Wilson - You and Mr. OMSH have had your laugh. *snort*